Mars wakes up, on the library floor, with a heart that feels heavy, and clearing. The Way a chest is after sobbing; wrung out. "Write it down," Mercury says, in his sleep, on the couch. "What?" "You have 56 dreams a night. You remembered one. Congratulations. Write it down." "It hurt though." "It opened you. That makes it real. Maybe more real than waking. What did it tell you?" "I saw a person I used to share the whole world with, and I met all his new friends, while he told me how happy he is. And I tried to be kind, and not feel invaded, as he brought his entire sphere, into my bedroom. And then they all left again, and I cried. And I asked his mom if this was going to be a regular thing; reverted to some time where I did not take control of my reality. She said no, and I felt relief. And I heard myself saying things like, 'I'm happy for him.' And I meant it. And I don't ever want to see him again." "Some Love cracks us open, doesn't it, Mars?" "It used to make me mad." "How does it feel Now?" "Now it just feels true." "Do you think it was true?" "That's not the point." Mercury smiles, "Good boy." They both go back to sleep.
The Waking -by Theodore Roethke I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow. I feel my fate in what I cannot fear. I learn by going where I have to go. We think by feeling. What is there to know? I hear my being dance from ear to ear. I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow. Of those so close beside me, which are you? God bless the Ground! I shall walk softly there, And learn by going where I have to go. Light takes the Tree; but who can tell us how? The lowly worm climbs up a winding stair; I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow. Great Nature has another thing to do To you and me; so take the lively air, And, lovely, learn by going where to go. This shaking keeps me steady. I should know. What falls away is always. And is near. I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow. I learn by going where I have to go.