Mercury calls Lilith

"Sorry about the Way
the Game ended, the other
night Lilitu, you 
 scared Mars away."

"I feel like that's a
bold accusation, and scarring 
Mars is something we did,
collectively, but OK."

"Personally, I think it was
the lightning, not us.
He was there, one minute,
and then, he was gone."

"Don't blame Jupiter,
for this, Mercury."

"We'll play again."

"I know."

"We'll pick up
where we left off."

"I know.  
We haven't even
 revealed your character yet."

"Lilitu, there's a letter here
for you, from Lucifer.
There are a few, actually."

"Will you burn them
for me?  In the fireplace?"

"Our fireplace is gas, Lilith."

"Bummer, well,
You can read them,
if you want to.  Turn them
into a book, or something.
Bind them up, 
and place them in 
the Philosophy section
of the Akasha.  They belong
somewhere, just not with me.
I have listened to him
long enough."

"Aren't you curious,
about what he has 
to say to you?"

"Not anymore.  Lucy
will always have something
to say to me.  He will
always be watching.  He will
always hook his words
in woven traps."

"Sounds familiar."

"Yeah.  We're twins.
Except, I won't always be
watching him.  If he has 
something to say to me
he's welcome to tell me
in the flesh."

"Do you love him?"

"Sure I love him, but
I grow tired of always
being pushed away,
being played with,
being made fun of,
being held at an arms
length.  His game has 
  become predictable.  
 I have grown numb 
to his rejection, and
numbness is an illness
in my opinion.  Better
to stay feeling, and just
deal with the loss of him."

"But what about that saying,
the Devil you know..."

"Devils are just power, Mercury.
And Lucy doesn't have any.  
Not really.  He doesn't 
want to be Here,
with me, and I am
weary of grasping at him.
It's like trying to catch
Air, with a butterfly net
-energetic, yet ultimately
pointless."

"Do you think he really
loves you?"

"Lucy is looking for meaning
in the Madness."

"So what?"

"So, I am Meaning, Mercury, 
but no, he doesn't 
Love me.  Not 

in any kind of Way
I want to be loved -yet
it matters, what you pay

attention to.  Thoughts
glom in the subconscious
until a story coagulates,

and surfaces.  Some people
have sexy thoughts,
they turn you on.
  
Your own thoughts, form 
around their Light.
Maybe arguing is the only

Way you are accustomed to 
receive Love.  It is important
to reflect upon

what motivates you, in
relationship to what you are
attracted to.  Lucy's thoughts
 
are not particularly 
malevolent.  I just don't feel 
like swimming anymore, with a

consciousness that doesn't really
care if I drown.  It's okay if he 
doesn't like me.  He can 

not like me, Here,
 in the Akasha, and I am
obliged to let him live

on forever, and be heard
without trying to 
meet him, or defend myself.

It could have been 
eyes, and a True feeling, 
 and an exciting idea.

It is I who believed
I was risking safety, to know 
him.  I felt the weight

of it, as I rode
back to him.  I had been 
made to distrust my feelings.

'Not real.  Not real,'
my Daddy said.  'Not
real, not really,'

said Lucy too.
Yes, this is a shape
of Light that feels 

familiar.  I dreamed
true a world, where I
manifested his approval -his 

approval being that I mean
Nothing to him.  
And for that, I take off 

my hat, to the Master 
in myself.  Imagine 
what else I could

put my Powers to
if I let him be?  He has stuck 
around, long enough, to see 

Love blossom.  Can one
deny the Love in a True
interaction?  It is

in me, so it need not
be in him.  Can one
deny the Faith

in a True outline;
in the fuzzy land,
where Light returns

to Sin?  But if I am
 to be left there,
 at the Altar,

 I need not 
 seek to keep 
  indulging it.
 
 His dance is not 
 a reflection 
of whether, or not

 I am lovable."

Mercury blinks,
as his attention leaves
her space.  He comes back,

"Yeah, I get that.  Well,
I'll make a Book
for him, but I am 
putting it
in the Mythology
section."