THE MATH: (Lilith + Gemini) INCONJUNCT (Pluto + Capricorn) = receiving the heat


The Knights dump Lilith

on her front porch, and Pluto

picks her up, to take her

to the ice plunge…

"So, how was class?"
Pluto ask Lilith,
as they shiver in the sauna,

"We learned this thing
called, 'Emotional Freedom
Technique'," Lilith says,
body wiggling, and teeth chattering.

"What?" ask Pluto.

"Tapping," Lilith explains,
flailing her arms around,
"The one where you poke yourSelves
repetitively along meridian points,
and hypnotize your body/mind
with fresh language.  The theme,
was Receiving."

"And what did you receive?"
Pluto deepens the line
of inquiry, as he lays down
on the sauna bench.

Lilith sighs, and lays down
across from him,
"Everyone was sharing
their limiting beliefs,
about how they do not feel
worthy of receiving what they want.
And I get that, according
to my father, I am still not
worthy of being mySelves -but
the primary concern
of mine, is that:
if I allow mySelves to receive
'help', I will be trapped
like a rat, by the people
who act in 'Love', but weaponize
their 'generosity', hooking their tenters 
in me to gain control of my narrative,
and create dependence on them.
I also panicked, because
as we reprogram our brains,
we repeat the instructor's
script, and I do not
like to regurgitate unless
it's the Tao.  My mind was
all like, 'What if this is
not how I want to
hypnotize mySelves?'
So, I did not
repeat what felt

"You've got trust
issues, boo,"
sighs Pluto.

"I know, right?"
Lilith confesses,
and closes her eyes,
"But I like the technique.
I just want to make
up my own Spells."

"Control freak,"
Pluto quips.

"You're one to talk,"
Lilith grins, and pours
Water on the hot stones,
filling the room with steam.

"Fuck you Lili," Pluto whines,
"It's too hot.  You are burning
my nose hairs," he dips
out to plunge again.
Lilith just smiles, in silence.
Receiving the heat,
she breathes in. 

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