THE MATH: (Venus + Leo) INCONJUNCT (Vesta Rx + Pisces) = inside, knowing


…Vesta wilts…

"To be honest,
I don't understand
what you write,"
a friend confesses,

"I'd have to slow down
to hear the World
you are steeping in."
I smile, as I leave my body,

"It's OK.  That's what 
everybody says."  But some
piece of me is screaming.
"The poems are for me,"

I steel mySelves, "They make me
better, at reading charts." 
And this is true, but hearing
mySelves say it, as a mechanism

of defense, drains the Life
out of me.  There is no greater
sorrow than this.  People tell me,
"I Love that you are

just out Here, being neuro-
divergent, and weird, not
caring."  But I do care.
Do not believe the sham.

Every confession is a stab
I welcome, because I want
to know the truth.  The Ones
who show me mercy

 say, "I don't understand,
but I feel your Word, working me
on some subconscious level."
And I nod, because that is

the Way.  "I know," I say,
"I Live at least two
tiers below."  "But I think it's great
you let us See your process.

We can hear you," One tells me,
"When you come to
the surface."  They mean
Well.  So I give them

the bright and funny
reels, of All
the AFAB, screaming,
let us out.

And I die
inside, knowing
what the World wants
from me, is shallow


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